Now that Hillary’s been named Secretary of State, who will be the junior senator from New York? And please don’t say her husband. Tell me he wouldn’t lower himself to such subpar conditions. The man was PRESIDENT. That’s like Pope Benedict retiring and becoming a nun.

Yes, I know John Quincy Adams became a congressman after losing reelection. Everyone knows that John Quincy Adams was a total deadbeat.

New York Gov. David Paterson—who took over for Spitzer after that whole messy international prostitution ring deal—will be charged with naming Hillary’s successor for the next two years. Some contenders include State Attorney General Andrew Cuomo (Kerry Kennedy’s ex-husband), Caroline Kennedy, and Robert Kennedy, Jr.

Am I sensing a pattern here?

There are plenty of other names that have been mentioned but I didn’t recognize them. Come on. Like you know the name of the Bronx Borough president.

[Political Ticker]

Politico has some harsh words for Obama following his announcement of his national security team. And by “harsh words,” I mean, “DAMN, girl, that’s harsh!”

“He is an intellectual, who is more impressed by academic and governing credentials than familiarity and loyalty.”

Ahhhh, the word that shall not be spoken in order to placate the less-informed masses: “intellectual,” someone impressed by smarts and experience. Loyalty? That’s how we ended up with a White House filled with (shudder) Arkansans.

“He isn’t so disdainful of the “Washington insiders” after all… It is clear now the “change” Obama will bring to Washington will center around his personal style and values, not the cast of characters by his side.”

Awwww, snap! Except, so what? The dreaded “Washington insiders” are the ones with the experience; the fact that many cabinet members are Clinton veterans is not surprising in the least. That was the last effective Democratic administration. I’d kill to have that economy again. (Seriously. I’d kill someone.)

“He is willing to jettison campaign promises to suit the political landscape.”

OH MY GOD CAN YOU BELIEVE IT?? Contrary to populist belief, Obama is, in the end, a politician and a pragmatist. What kind of campaign promises should a candidate running for the highest office in the world make? “I’ll do the best I can to improve the healthcare system, but I have serious doubts that I’ll be able to implement anything in the first four years. So keep rationing those prescription drugs, Grandma.”

There is no way to govern this country successfully except from the center. Who’s Obama supposed to take his cues from, the Huffington Post? The vast majority of voters are moderate—not extremely liberal, not extremely conservative. Like it or not, Obama’s going to have to keep the crazies in check.

[5 Things the Cabinet says about Obama]

Obama officially announced Hillary as his Secretary of State earlier today, clearing the way for me to go work for her at the State Department. (Sorry, Evan. I have to think about my political future.)

Although I did think it was a little odd for Obama to plant one on her after his announcement. I never saw that with Nixon and Kissinger.

Obama also introduced the rest of his national security team—Robert Gates will stay on as Defense Secretary (there’s your token Republican so quit your bitching), retired Gen. James Jones will be national security adviser, AZ Gov. Janet Napolitano will head Homeland Security, and Susan Rice will serve as UN ambassador.

The President-elect called Hillary an “American of tremendous stature who will have my complete confidence,” adding that he has no doubt that she is “the right person to lead our State Department and to work with me in tackling this ambitious foreign policy agenda.”

But first, the Obama team has to erase her campaign debt, which amounts to roughly $6.5 million. Two words. Bail out.

[CNN]

Earlier today at the Rose Garden, still-President Bush did the traditional Thanksgiving turkey pardon, but not before one of his aides flashed the poor bird. Is that a wishbone in your pocket or…oh, forget it.

In case you’re wondering what happens to the spared turkey, it is flown first class to Disneyland where it will be featured in the Disney’s Thanksgiving Day Parade, after which it will be surrounded by snotty-nosed kids eager to pet a live turkey.

I can’t decide which is worse.

Ross Ramsey of Texas Weekly has a fascinating post about the areas of the state in which the Republican victory at the presidential level was greater in 2008 than 2004 in terms of the number of votes that separated the R candidate from the D candidate. Hard to believe that there were counties in which McCain’s support was greater than Bush’s, but not at all hard to see how Obama would have done worse in certain places — say, East Texas — than Kerry did. In any case, Ross reports that of the top 25 counties in Texas, three were redder in ‘08 than they were in ‘04: Montgomery, Galveston, and Jefferson. The counties that were bluer to the greatest degree in ‘08 vs. ‘04: Harris, Dallas, and Bexar.

President-elect Barack Obama will appoint former Chairman of the Federal Reserve Paul Volcker today to head the new President’s Economic Recovery Advisory Board, which is tasked with jump-starting the economy, tackling the current recession, stabilizing financial markets, confronting the housing crisis, and finding a cure for cancer.

OH MY GOD WHO IN THEIR RIGHT MIND WOULD TAKE THAT JOB?

The board’s mission is to provide Obama with an official forum for getting expert advice outside of the normal bureaucratic channels, aka “The Congress.”

You might remember Volcker (if you’re of a certain age, which I am not) from the Carter and Reagan administrations, in which he served as Fed chairman. He was then succeeded by Alan Greenspan, best known for his marriage to MSNBC’s Andrea Mitchell.

Little known fact: Volcker’s middle name is Adolph. Now there’s a name you don’t hear much anymore.

UH-oh. There’s that word again.

At Obama’s press conference on the economy today, he said that his decisive win has unquestionably given him a “mandate.”

“We had, I think, a decisive win, because of the extraordinary desire for change on the part of the American people. And so I don’t think there is any question that we have a mandate to move the country in a new direction, and not continue the same old practices that have gotten us into the fix that we’re in.”

However, Obama did follow up with this: “I won 53 percent of the vote. That means 46 or 47 percent of the country voted for John McCain.”

Back in 2004, Cheney declared that the reelected president “ran forthrightly on a clear agenda for this nation’s future, and the nation responded by giving him a mandate.” (This, despite the fact that Bush won the popular vote by an extremely narrow margin.)

[via TPM]

Blink.

Seriously, how old is this guy? This picture is straight out of Take Your Child to Work day.

David Ogden has emerged as the top candidate for deputy attorney general, the second in command at the Department of Justice. Ogden currently oversees the department’s transition for the Obama administration and, from the looks of it, beat out everyone else in his seventh grade class for the job.

Ogden is a partner at the WilmerHale law firm and was in charge of the Justice Department’s civil division under…wait for it…Clinton

The challenges facing the incoming DAG will include how to shut down Guantanamo, and how to develop a new regime for interrogating possible terrorists. Are you kidding me? I’d have better luck intimidating terrorists.

[WashPost]

Yes, the Minnesota recount is still going. While the rest of the country is ready to move on, the Land of 10,000 Lakes hangs in the balance. Will they be represented in the Senate by Democrat Al Franken or Republican Norm Coleman? Do they even care anymore? (For what it’s worth, I hear Franken’s a real jackass.)

As of this morning, the number of contested ballots is only growing. So far, 2,801 ballots have been challenged, 1,401 questioned by the Franken campaign and 1,400 by Coleman’s. The recount could extend into next month. Oh, for God’s sake, let’s just call it a draw and forget about the folks of Minnesota. They talk funny. It’s annoying.

Unofficial results show Coleman in the lead by a mere 172 votes, or less than one-half of one percent.

Minnesota isn’t the only problem child, however. Georgia is in the midst of a runoff between incumbent Republican Senator Saxby Chambliss and Democrat Jim Martin. If Democrats end up winning both of these contests, they’ll control 60 senate seats, a filibuster-proof majority.

Prediction: Coleman and Chambliss keep their seats, which is probably for the best. The D’s already control Congress and the White House. If they get to 60 senate seats, there will be no checks on the party in power and we will be thrown into socialist chaos.

[Political Ticker]

The AP is reporting that President Bush has granted pardons to 14 individuals (most being former members of his administration) and commuted the prison sentences of two others.

Here are three pardons from Texas:

—Brenda Jean Dolenz-Helmer of Fort Worth. Convicted for reporting or helping cover up a crime.

—William Hoyle McCright Jr. of Midland. Sentenced for making false entries, books, reports or statements to a bank.

—Daniel Figh Pue III of Conroe. Convicted of illegal treatment, storage and disposal of a hazardous waste without a permit.

Watch Eileen and Evan discuss Citigroup and the latest government bailout ($20 billion in direct investments), Timothy Geithner as treasury secretary (all because Larry Summers said girls are dumb), the Bush tax cuts, and why Eileen won’t be getting a raise this year.

Wait. WHAT?!

Yes, I realize we’re in the midst of dire financial straits. In fact, President-elect Obama just said we’re in an “economic crisis of historic proportions.” But there is something you can do. Have more sex (otherwise known as, limiting your withdrawals). Last I heard, at least that’s still free, under normal circumstances.

The Rev. Ed Young of the evangelical Fellowship Church in Grapevine, TX, has challenged his congregation (married couples only, of course) to participate in a “sexperiment” of “seven days of sex,” which he says will help them move from “whining about the economy to whoopee!”

While there’s certainly nothing wrong with investing in sex, single members of the church are advised to indulge in something else, like chocolate cake. You think I’m kidding.

[via NYT]

Evan’s good friend Mark Halperin of TIME told Politico that the 2008 election was tainted by extreme media bias and pro-Obama coverage. I love media retrospectives.

“It’s the most disgusting failure of people in our business since the Iraq war,” Halperin said, pointing out two profiles from the New York Times concerning potential first ladies Cindy McCain (which he called “vicious” and negative) and Michelle Obama (which he called a “front-page endorsement of what a great person she is.”)

“I think it’s incumbent upon people in our business to make sure that we’re being fair,” he said. “The daily output was the most disparate of any campaign I’ve ever covered, by far.”

Halperin’s assertions led me to do some fact-checking of my own, and by “my own” I mean “screaming at interns to do this for me.” (The worst part? Since they’re constantly rotating, I don’t even bother to learn their names. I just call them Intern 1, Intern 2, and Intern 3.)

Turns out that Halperin’s coverage of the election was pretty balanced overall, but then again, his typical blog posts run somewhere between one and three sentences—not much room for analysis and opinion.

Back in January during the primaries, Halperin appeared on CNN and said this:

Yes, [critical press coverage] hurt [Hillary] badly and it continues, I think, to potentially hurt her badly. We are still at a tipping point, I think, in the Obama coverage. Will it be laudatory and breathless and say, isn’t this exciting, or will he get the kind of scrutiny that a front-runner normally gets?

Here’s what he said in December:

Hillary’s just held to a different standard in every respect. The press rooted for Obama to go negative, and when he did, he was applauded. When she does it, it’s treated as this huge violation of propriety. It’s not a level playing field.

As far as primary coverage was concerned, clearly there was bias because the media hates women, especially women named Hillary. The coverage during the general election, however, seemed to be more positively skewed toward Obama because he was running a phenomenal campaign. Or maybe they were all like Chris Matthews and totally smitten.

Employed! Mark Halperin reports that on MSNBC’s Morning Joe

Andrea Mitchell said University of Texas’ Jim Steinberg will be Deputy Secretary of State.

Hand-lettered sign held up by panhandler on the corner of Lake Austin Boulevard and the Mopac frontage road, in Austin:

FIRST OFFICIAL WEALTH REDISTRIBUTION STATION ENACTED BY PRESIDENT OBAMA